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Eulogy

9 posts in this topic

Posted

He asked a girl out, once. Psychiatrists think she'll be catatonic for decades'

'Last week, the blighter went to the bar, and asked the bartender to make him a Zombie. The bartender said "God beat me to it."'

'Heretic's mother is so fat and ugly, the doctors had to roll her in flour as she gave birth, so they could see which part the baby was going to come out of'

'When the head appeared, the midwife wondered allowed how Mrs Heretic had managed to turn her vagina inside out'

'His mother pointed at the afterbirth and said to Heretic "That's your aspiration."'

'Heretic's mother asked for an abortion. Every doctor she consulted advised her to keep that thing hidden from the world. Unfortunately, after 9 months he wouldn't stay hidden'

'Before he eats, Heretic has to force out a fart so he can distinguish between his mouth and his arse'

'http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2010/oct/06/david-cameron-conservative-conference-speech'

'Heretic's obsession with comics comes from his search to find something uglier than he is'

'You're doing well, Blighter, but I think Heretic has the slight edge here.

'Heretic's mother insists he wear a bag over his head. The bag insist he burn the bag afterwards'

'Heretic has a 3 digit IQ. 84.5'

'Last time Heretic tried a chat up line, the boy handed it back to him to hang himself'

'The ultrasound one?'

'Thanks'

'That's pretty good.'

'Darkness is the reason we turn lights on. Heretic's face is the reason we turn them off'

'When Heretic's mother had her ultrasound, the doctor smeared vaseline on the screen for 'aesthetic purposes''

'You guys are pretty good. This should be its own thread.'

'It's hard to snap without resorting to swear words.

<img src=\'http://www.galilean-library.org/site/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rofl.gif\' class=\'bbc_emoticon\' alt=\':rofl:\' />'

'The Blighter sees a proctologist. That's the only one he can see eye to eye.'

'When the Heretic was born, his mother demanded a blood test to prove the baby wasn't hers'

'The pulled through one was good

'The other day I was looking up Big Blooming Blighter's family tree and i found 3 dogs using it.

'When the blighter was born, his doctor went to the waiting room and told the father, "I'm sorry. We did everything we could. But he pulled through."'

'The blighter's mom never breast fed him. She said she liked him only as a friend.'

'When the blighter's dad wanted sex, the mother showed him a picture of the Blighter.

'Y'know, BBB is such a bum. He goes to orgies just to eat the grapes.'

'BBB is just sad. He and his girlfriend were happy for years. Then they met.'

'The Sikh likes to dress as a lollipop, to lure in children. Also, the Shack has terrible reviews. Sick sheikh seeks to shank sick, sucked Sikh in shit Shake Shack'

'C'mon, folks, I'm busy and can't be on much just now. Get some conversations going in threads so I will have new stuff to read'

'Obviously we are parasites. We feed off trolls and other species of internet lackwits. Let's go fishing

'I promise a slew of posts... on foundationalism and phenomenology Thus, this board will be infested with such topics of mind-numbing tedium and trivia

New topic: Frontier Thesis & Economics, posted in Explore by chad3006.'

'Do your worst, Comic Book guy'

'BBB is such a blighter. When he visited a hooker, and dropped his pants, the hooker dropped her price.

'Alright, there's no need to goad the other members'

'Big Blooming Blighter is fair game, though.'

'I know we won't see S.E. deal with the impossibility of a lolbertarian fire dept. because he already ignored the issue when pressed repeatedly about it in chat.'

'Keep those posts coming, Heretic. They only bore small minds.'

'The Lolbertarian Fire Dept. Priceless But it can easily be shown that instituted generally, the Lib Fire Dept. would crate free riders all over the place, and destroy lolbertarianism. We won't see S.E. deal with this fact, I bet'

'When the Blighter answers the door on Halloween, the kids give him candy.'

'The Blighter's girlfriend is so fat and ugly that she's known as a two-bagger. The Blighter puts a bag over his head in the case the bag over her head breaks.

'The blighter donated sperm to a sperm bank. Now he's the proud pappy of 3 puppies.'

'The blighter stuck his head out of the window once and got arrested for mooning.'

'When the Blighter visits a freak show, they let him in for free.'

'When the Blighter was playing in the sandbox as a wee lad, the cat kept covering him up.'

'The Blighter's so damn ugly they send him to prison to cure sex offenders.

'When the Blighter went to the massage parlor, they told him it was self-service.'

'The Big Blooming Blighter has a lot of pimples. One day he fell asleep in the library. He woke up and a blind man was reading his face.'

'The Heretic's brain has claimed job-seeker's allowance ever since birth'

'Heretic is a forgiving fellow, and so loves nature despite what she did to him'

'When watching The Omen, Heretic was the only one not to see a problem with Damien's mother being a jackel'

'Heretic receives charity aid from zombies who saw his face on a television appeal'

'Heretic's family tree was burned to ashes in an act of justice'

'The Heretic has no penis. God took it from him, lest His mistake be repeated'

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Posted

It is a funny exchange, I retrieved this information for BBB from the database, in case anybody needs to know that.

Names have been removed.

-Scott

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Posted

Seems like the ordering is way off in the OP. It should start with "comic book guy" and the non-snaps should be eliminated.

Actually it's missing about 20 more snaps I made, but let us all be fair to the Blighter. :twisted:

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Posted

I am merely posting up what was given me, in verbatim.

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Posted

Sorry, I only grabbed what came directly out of the database, there are only 62 lines, and I saw no way of ordering them, but there could be date associated with them, I can try again sometime. Raw data can be hard to interpret sometimes :)

-Scott

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Posted

Try this test.

Scroll down and do the quiz as it instructs and find out what

movie is your favorite. It really works! This amazing math quiz can likely

predict which of 18 films you would enjoy the most. Don't ask me how.

Pick a number from 1-9.

Multiply by 3.

Add 3.

Multiply by 3 again.

Now add the two digits together to find your predicted favorite movie in the

list of 18 movies below.

Mine was "Star Wars" - exactly right! So be honest, and do it before you

scroll down to see the list below. It's easy and it works.

Now look up your number in the list below...

1. Gone With The Wind

2. E.T.

3. Beverly Hills Cop

4. Star Wars

5. Forrest Gump

6. The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

7. Jaws

8. Grease

9. The Joy of Anal Sex With A Goat

10. Casablanca

11. Jurassic Park

12. Shrek

13. Pirates of the Caribbean

14. Titanic

15. Raiders Of The Lost Ark

16. Home Alone

17. Mrs. Doubtfire

18. Toy Story

It is really amazing, isn't it

Sort of a non-sequitor I just couldn't resist... :(

Dave

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Posted

You get a rep point for number 9 on the list

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You get a rep point for number 9 on the list

Since you're an Einstein fan, here's a less known quote:

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.

(Words of Wisdom from Albert Einstein)

The above helped... :)

Dave

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Posted

What about if you sit near a pretty girl while you're with your girlfriend and it slowly dawns on you that your girlfriend is quite ugly, and you don't feel anything towards her anyway?

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